"The consequences of your denial will be with you for a lifetime and will be passed down to the next generations. Break your silence on abuse "
-Patty Rase Hopson
"I had no idea that day would be the last time I would see her alive. Only through the void that I feel now and with my own adult, mother-mind, do I wish I could have had a chance to ask her why she stayed, and, God, oh God, why did she go back that day? Did she love me?"
The book was a quick read but not an easy read. There were plenty of times I wish I had been there as their "saving grace" type. I wanted to jump into the pages of the book, yank April, her siblings and her mother from the man they called father and husband and show them what life could be like without living in constant fear of what's to come.
After the tragedy with their parents, I went from wanting to rescue the children and their mother to wanting to help the kids and their grandparents (the fathers parents). I did feel sympathy for their grandmother because she did lose her daughter in-law, son, husband and sister in a five year period so of course she went from a sweet grandmother to a bitter angry woman.
The kids used to love going to their grandparents because it was a refuge. After they moved in with their grandparents, it became another place of fear from both grandparents. After her husband died the kids dealt with verbal abuse from their grandmother.
April got the brunt for the blame of the death of her her mother from her grandmother.
"If you were a better child..."
I wanted to verbally smack most, if not all the people in the book for how they turned their backs on them because they didn't want to get involved or get in the middle of it. They would rather stick their head in the sand like ostriches and play dumb.
Besides the fact that this book was almost like a diary on what really happened, it opens peoples eyes to the fact that people can be and were cowardly when someone is in that kind of situation/environment. I felt proud of April and how she came around after what she went through and put herself through. I also pity her siblings because of the outcome of their life. 'The system' failed them miserably I think. This was a very good read. Good discussion book. One I would recommend and read again.
Those with domestic violence in their past or someone close to them, may find this book a bit uncomfortable.
I like that April said in the very beginning of her book that she started this book years ago and made sure to finish it because for her, it was a form of facing her giant and moving forward.